me + pocket-rocket = a very unfortunate event

I am married to a very adventurous man. This adventurous man has challenged me over the course of our relationship to try new adventurous things. If you know me, you know that I like to keep my feet on the ground. Upside-down roller coaster rides scare me, sky-diving terrifies me...I can stand on the edge of a cliff but I have no desire to repell down it. I have tried outdoor wall climbing and indoor wall climbing as a means of impressing my husband by trying to do something that he absolutely loves. And so, on Tuesday, May 30, I endevoured to once again make my husband proud of me.

I arrived at the church later than usual because I had to tend to some things at home. A large group of teens were outside with my husband enjoying the evening sun. As I stepped out of the car, I noticed one of the girls on something peculiar. It looked like a crotchrocket that had been put into the drier and shrunk. It was about the size of something that my 4 year-old niece could ride. I was soon told that it was a 'pocket-rocket.'

As I chatted with the teens, my husband said to me, "Honey, you should try it! I did. It's a lot of fun." The owner, whom we call by his last name, Patterson, said, "Yeah, come try it!"

"Well...I don't know...I am accident prone and I've never been on a dirt bike before..." as the words trailed out of my mouth I thought to myself that perhaps it wouldn't be so difficult.

"It's not hard! Come give it a try." Oh the pressure of trying to be adventurous!

I was soon shown where the brake was and the gas. My husband took a little ride on it to show me just how easy it was.

As I sat on the tiny device, I remember feeling nervous as I tried to get my feet situated.

"Crack open the gas!" Patterson said.

"Sarah, just go easy on the gas," My husband said.

It was like two little people sitting on either side of my shoulder trying to tell me what to do.

"Crack it open! Come on!" said Patterson.

"Take your time. Go easy." said my husband.

As I "cracked open" the gas, I squealed with delight as I took off, and in a matter of three seconds I started wobbling. "Uh-oh" I remember thinking, "How do I slow down? I'm losing control..." Then, the pocket-rocket headed from the pavement to the lawn, and as I flew over the top of it and face first into the grass I remember thinking, "I'm such an idiot." As I laughed and cried at the same time due to my embarrassment, I thought to myself, "Why? Why did you have to do this in front of the whole youth group?" Some of the guys took up for me which made me feel a little better, but I must admit that I was thoroughly embarrassed.

"Are you hurt?" said one of the teens.

"No," I responded, "I think the only thing hurting right now is my pride!"

Needless to say, I think I missed out on $20,000 from America's Funniest Home Videos.