Alone with my Laptop

Somebody must have been praying for me today. As I sat in the midst of a meeting concerning a student who had a major blow out with behaviour last week, I was asked, "Sarah, what are you willing to do concerning this student?" You must understand that after Wednesday of last week, I was struggling with feelings toward this student. I am not at liberty to say everything that happened, but let's just say that I had to lock my classroom door. One thing I can recount is that student snarkily saying, "I hate you Mrs. Canney!" to which I responded, "I love you too!" at this the students found great amusement. I have never been one to hold a grudge, and so as I sat there in today's meeting, the Lord reminded me of my love for this student - one of my own kids who I've invested in this year. I responded to that question,"what are you willing to do...?" with "Whatever it takes." I will do whatever it takes to help this student. I refuse to give up or give in, or say this student is a lost cause. Teaching isn't about me, it's about those kids. Those kids who may get more time with me than with their parents. Those kids who love being at school because it feels safer than home. Those kids who the only hug they may receive that day could be from me. Let's face it. The majority of kids in the system today come from broken families and with that comes a lot of baggage. I know someone was praying for me, because the rest of the day I had an incredible peace. Tuesdays are often hectic for me because I'm on duty, but I was at peace, so I was fine. Tomorrow I have a meeting that will involve administration, the parents and the student. I'm a bit nervous, but I know the Lord will be my strength and my song.

I survived Mother's Day :) I knew I would. I only had one comment about, "Sarah's not on stage. Could that mean she's expecting?" because we had an all men's praise team with the exception of a young lady home from college who led the worship. The comment was a joking one, and I was able to handle it. I managed to hold myself together when all of the mother's stood and I sat. Apart from that I had a woman who was once in my position give me a hug and share some tender words of encouragement. The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me. And so I write this not as a "woe is me this is my sob story" but as a praise to the Lord for the work He is doing in me. Some teaching positions have been posted for the fall already, and I am looking into applying for them. I have contemplated getting my Masters, but I really don't know if that's what I'm to do at this time. And so I will pray and wait. My loan will be paid off this week and I have to praise God for his provision and blessing. Weeks like this when I'm overwhelmed with marking that I'm behind on and extra meetings, can be trying, but I know someone is praying for me. I know there are those who pray for me regularly, but God must have really impressed me on someone's mind today. I don't know who, but I can feel it in my heart because of how my day went.

And so I sit here at home alone while my husband is at youth, wishing I could be with him but working away - scanning children's pictures for their fairytale stories that will be published on the computer, lesson planning, marking speeches, contemplating tomorrow's meeting as to what I need to say and just thinking about my life in general - thankful for the prayers of someone who knew that I needed some extra help today to carry me through the week.